Sunday, 13 October 2013 00:00

How to keep your spirits up if you get rejected?

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When you see a job advertised that just seems like your dream job, that you are perfectly suited to, that is exactly what you’ve been looking for; it is difficult to not feel happy and excited about it. It is easy to feel that, that job has got your name all over it. When your friends, family or trusted colleagues tell you the same thing, it can increase your desire and confidence.


I know of many people who have spent, not just hours, but days, preparing their CV’s and applications, just for that one job; more care and thought has gone into it than you can imagine. 


Hit send on your email, or on the job application on the Job Board Website, or pop your letter in the post, and then it is done, all you can do then is wait and hope.


The anticipation can be killing; what you want is the phone to ring, almost immediately, and an enthusiastic employer to tell you, that you are just what they have been looking for, when can you come and see them. 


If you are lucky you get an immediate acknowledgement to let you know they have received your application, but often you hear nothing at all, ever. Day after day there is nothing; the phone is silent, the email in-box full of spam, but not a response from the employer. You can call and get brushed off “don’t call us, we’ll call you”, either by an overworked and apparently uncaring recruitment company, or from the employer themselves. 


If you get an interview, that’s great, but if it ends in rejection, it is difficult not to be disappointed; in fact often interviews that appear to go well, with encouraging comments from employers, to make you think you are in with a chance, or perhaps even more than that, can only heighten your hope, and make disappointment of not being successful even worse. It is like you have been lifted up, only to be dropped down; you invest emotional capital as well as your time and effort in applying for jobs.  If you get rejected once or twice that’s bad enough, but if you get a string of rejections, it can really knock your confidence, and make you feel down. You can experience a range of feelings from mild disappointment through to depression, lack of confidence, despair, frustration, worry, fear, anger etc.


We all have an inherent need to feel loved and wanted, and when you get rejected, you can easily feel anything but loved and wanted. It is like being knocked down, getting up again, and then being knocked down again. Most people have the resilience to cope with it a few times, but after a while, you can begin to expect it, rejection after rejection, after rejection. So how can you and should you keep your spirits up?


There good news is that there is plenty you can do to lift your spirits if you get rejected, and here is just a few ideas:

“Turn Negative Energy into Positive Energy... 

See Yourself Being Surrounded in an Invisible Cloak of Teflon that Negativity Simply can’t stick to.”


 “No is Normal on the Path to Job Hunting Success

The Best People Have Often Been Rejected Before”

Copyright Jonathan Blain


1.       Firstly reframe the way you see things

Rejection is highly likely for most people, in fact it has to be expected, you can’t be all things to all people, and all it means is that the employer thought someone else was more suitable for them.


No rarely means “no never”, it usually means “no – not now”. In applying for a job, you are selling yourself, and many people don’t feel comfortable selling, ask the best performing salesmen, and they are likely to tell you they face rejection on a daily basis, it comes with the territory, rejection is a sign you are trying, at least you are applying for jobs – you should congratulate yourself on that.


See Rejections as a sign of progress on your path towards job hunting success.


See each rejection as an opportunity to learn and improve, to raise your standards and improve your job hunting and career management skills. Let each rejection increase your resolve and determination.


See Job Hunting as a competitive game. Once you realise you are in a competitive game, you can start to think more about how you can compete and win.


2.       Change the Way You Think and What You Think About

What you think has a profound impact on every aspect of your life. Read Napoleon Hill’s book “Think and Grow Rich”, Listen to “The Strangest Secret” audio by Earl Nightingale, or watch or read “The Secret” by  Rhonda Byrne.


Employers are allowed to think what they want and do what they want within the law, you are not in control of them, but you are in control of what you see, what you think and what you do. First seek to understand the employer and then think about what you can offer, what is different about you that they would want, and what as a package you offer, that would make them want to choose you, rather than all the other people who apply.


Tap into your Subconscious mind; see how it can be unwittingly sabotaging you, and also how it can help you to achieve things beyond your wildest imagination.


Develop a winning attitude. Remember research has shown that 97% of employers have said they would rather employ someone with the right attitude and mind-set, rather than the right skill-set.


3.       Change What You Do.

Seek Help from Friends, Family, Trusted Colleagues and Professionals


Take responsibility for your own future, don’t feel sorry for yourself; step up, raise your game, raise your standards, start playing to win.


Work out who you really are, what you really want and then think about how you can achieve that. Find some meaning and purpose in your life, and work towards something that is bigger than yourself, get the energy in the universe behind you.


Create a vision for your future, develop a strategy of how to achieve your vision and specific plans that you can actually implement. Implement your plan, measure your results, make changes as required until you finally achieve your goals.


Celebrate achievements even minor ones on your path to success.


Learn from all your job hunting experiences and make it make you stronger.


Don’t just follow what everyone else does, do more and do better.


Don’t take rejection personally.


Find Courage and don’t let fear destroy your life.

Jonathan Blain

Job Hunting and Career Problem Solving Expert and Best Selling Author of 12 Books including:

“Job Hunting and Career Pain Relief – How to solve your job hunting and career problems”

He Offers New Thinking, New Ideas and New Solutions Designed to Get You the Best Results Quickly



Read 2228 times Last modified on Thursday, 26 November 2015 07:59

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